Dinah-Moe Humm

I couldn't say where she's comin' from,
But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe Humm.
She strolled on over, said Look here, bum.
I got a forty dollar bill say you can't make me cum.
Ya' jes can't do it.

She made a bet with her sister who's a little bit dumb,
She could prove it any time all men was scum.
I don't mind that she called me a bum,
But I knew right away she was really gonna cum.
So I got down to it.

I whipped off her bloomers an' stiffened my thumb,
An' applied rotation on her sugar plum.
I poked 'n' stroked till my wrist got numb,
But I still didn't hear no Dinah-Moe Humm, Dinah-Moe Humm.

Dinah-Moe Humm, Dinah-Moe Humm,
Where's this Dinah-Moe comin' from?
I done spent three hours an' I ain't got a crumb,
From the Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe,
From the Dinah-Moe Humm.

I got a spot that gets me hot (Oooh!), and you ain't been to it. (No, no, no no!)
I got a spot that gets me hot (Oooh!), and you ain't been to it. (Nooo!)
I got a spot that gets me hot, but you ain't been to it. (No, no, no no!)
I got a spot that gets me hot, but you ain't been to it.
'Cause I can't get into it unless I get out of it.
An' I gotta get out of it before I get into it.
'Cause I never get into it unless I get out of it.
An' I gotta be out of it to get myself into it.

She looked over at me with a glazed eye,
And some bovine perspiration on her upper lip area.
And she said...

Just get me wasted an' you're half-way there,
'Cause if my mind's tore up then my body don't care.
I rubbed my chinny-chin-chin an' said My my my,
What sort of thing might this lady get high upon?

I checked out her sister who was holdin' the bet,
An' wondered what kind of trip the young lady was on.
The forty dollar bill didn't matter no more,
When her sister got nekkid an' laid on the floor.

She said Dinah-Moe might win the bet,
But she could use a little OOO-OW! if I wasn't done yet.
I told her just because the sun want a place in the sky,
No reason to assume I wouldn't give her a try.

So I pulled on her hair, got her legs in the air,
An' asked if she had any cooties in there.
(Whaddya mean cooties! No cooties on me!)
She was buns-up kneelin'.
(Buns up!)
I was wheelin' 'n' dealin'.
(Wheelin' 'n' dealin' 'n' oooh!)
She surrendered to the feelin'.
(She sweetly surrendered!)
An' she started in to squealin'.

Dinah-Moe watched from the edge of the bed,
With her lips just a-twitchin' an' her face gone red.
Some drool rollin' down from the edge of her chin,
While she spied the condition her sister was in.

She quivered 'n quaked 'n' clutched at herself,
While her sister made a joke about her mental health.
'Till Dinah-Moe finally did give in,
But I told her all she really needed was some discipline.

Kiss my aura...Dora...Mmm...it's real angora.
Would y'all like some more-a? Right here on the flora?
An' how 'bout you, Fauna? Y'wanna?

Mmm...sound like you chokin' on somethin'.

Did you say you want some more?
Well, here's some more...

Oh sure...look,
Do you think I could interest you in a pair of zircon encrusted tweezers?

Mmm...tweezers!
Wait a minute, lemme sterilize 'em.
Gimme your lighter.

I couldn't say where she's comin' from,
But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe Humm.
She strolled on over, said Look here, bum.
I got a forty dollar bill say you can't make me cum.
Ya' jes can't do it.

I whipped off her bloomers an' stiffened my thumb,
An' applied rotation on her sugar plum.
I poked 'n' stroked till my wrist got numb,
An' you know I heard some Dinah-Moe Humm,
Some Dinah-Moe Humm', Dinah-Moe Humm,
Dinah-Moe Humm,
And Dinah-Moe,
And Dinah-Moe,
An some Dinah-Moe,
A little Dinah-Moe,
An' some Dinah-Moe,
A little Dinah-Moe,
Dinah-Moe...