Don’t Sit on my Jimmy Shands

When the party hit full swing I saw you come reelin' in
Had that six-pack in a stranglehold
Now you swagger, now you sway, why don't ya fall the other way
I've got somethin' here worth more than gold

Don't sit on my Jimmy Shands
Don't sit on my Jimmy Shands
They don't mend with sticky tape and glue
Don't sit on my Jimmy Shands
Don't sit on my Jimmy Shands
That's my very best advice to you

Call me precious, I don't mind 78's are hard to find
Just can't get good shellac since the war
This one's the Beltona brand finest label in the land
They don't make 'em like that any more

Don't sit on my Jimmy Shands
Don't sit on my Jimmy Shands
They don't mend with sticky tape and glue
Don't sit on my Jimmy Shands
Don't sit on my Jimmy Shands
That's my very best advice to you

Darlin' though you’re twice my size I don't mean to patronize
Honey let me lead you by the hand
Find a lap or find a chair you can park it anywhere
Just don't rest your cheeks against my man

Don't sit on my Jimmy Shands
Don't sit on my Jimmy Shands
They don't mend with sticky tape and glue
Don't sit on my Jimmy Shands
Don't sit on my Jimmy Shands
That's my very best advice to you

No shindig is half complete without that famous polka beat
That's why they invite me I suppose
Waltzes, strathspeys, eights and reels
Now you know how good it feels
Crank the handle boys away she goes